"Filipino" Muna Ngayon

Kung meron man akong nais gawin sa panahon na ito, siguro lahat ng mayroon ako ngayon ay iluluhod ko sa pasasalamat. Maraming nangyari sa buhay ko sa mga nakaraang buwan. Karamihan ng araw ay hindi masaya at puro pagsubok. Sa ilang araw naman, puro pagpapala at grasya ng Panginoon ang nagpapasigla sa akin. Nadagdagan ako ng minamahal ngunit ang isang ito ay natatangi. Bagama't ang puso ko ay sa Panginoon, sa panlupang pananalita, ang puso ko ay sa kanya lamang. Sa pagmamahal ko sa nilalang na ito, may mga taong nagmamahal sa akin na hindi natuwa at ang ilan ay nasaktan. Hindi ko gusto ito. Ngunit ang Panginoon ay matapat. Mayroon akong kasiguraduhan na ang lahat ay maaayos din. Sa ngayon, pininpili ko na iwanan sa kamay ng Diyos ang mga ito sapagkat alam kong hindi ko rin kakayanin pasanin ang lahat sa aking balikat. Masaya ako pero batid kong mas magiging masaya ang mga darating na panahon. Masaya ang hinaharap dahil alam ko na ang kapayapaan na nagmumula sa Panginoong Hesus ang pupuno sa aming mga puso. Ang buhay ng tao ay walang saysay kung ito ay igugugol lamang sa mga bagay hindi rin lang magtatagal dito sa lupa. Higit sa lahat, ang buhay natin ay sadyang regalo lamang mula sa Diyos. Ako ay Kanyang nilikha para sa Kanya. Ako ay nabubuhay para sa Kanya. At ang buhay na ito ay nararapat lang din na magtapos ng matagumpay para lamang sa Kanya. Mahal ko ang Panginoong Hesus higit pa sa kahit kanino man.

August 17, 2010

This is it.

Forgiveness [unfinished]

Forgiveness

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. Matthew 18:21-22 NIV

In a conversation, I have shared to a friend that what could release her from her bitterness is forgiveness.  She said that she couldn't do it.  I told her, a person can only forgive if he/she has experienced real forgiveness in her life. 

An insight came to me after today's Sunday service.  A person has to realize that he has sinned in order to pave way for repentance, forgiveness and genuine freedom from guilt.  When we say that it is thru Jesus Christ's death on the cross that our sins has been forgiven, it doesn't mean that our sins were just pardoned without paying the cost.  What happened was Jesus received the wages of our sins [which is death] on our behalf.  He has become the sacrifice for our sins - the blameless lamb of God.  He did it because of love.  For God so loved that world that He gave his only Son [Jesus] that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have an everlasting life.  Sounds familiar?  That's John 3:16.  The salvation we would receive from accepting Jesus as our Lord and personal Savior is not cheap.  The life of Jesus was given for the forgiveness of our sins.  The Lord has already made the first step. Will you accept His forgiveness? 

Inspired

Everyone has a story to tell but not all stories are exceptional. The ones proved to be one were those authored by the Lord. I too have a story to tell. As of now, the story is still in the making but even if it is yet to be done, it is wonderful enough to be testified. What more if I finished the race well? Wow! What amazing God I am serving. ---> inspired to write my very own "Beautiful in its own time"

Hold God to His Bargain

Hold God to His Bargain

 Wednesday, June 30, 2010 at 4:14pm

 

"Let not our longing slay the appetite of our living. It is true that our youth is fast fleeting, and I know the rush of wants, the perfect fury of desire which such a thought summons. All that it involves - this getting on to thirty - brings a push of hurry and a surge of 'possible' regrets over the soul. And, Betty, this is just exactly what we have bargained for. Obedience involves for us, not physical suffering, perhaps, nor social ostracism as it has for some, but this warring with worries and regrets, this bringing into captivity our thoughts. We have planted (in our integrity) the banner of our trust in God. The consequences are His responsibility."

- a part of Jim Elliot's letter to Elisabeth Elliot (February 2, 1952) during their waiting period
This was taken from the book, "Passion and Purity" by Elisabeth Elliot.

My Oath to You by Gina Idea

MY OATH TO YOU by Gina Idea

 Saturday, June 26, 2010 at 3:41pm

I got this poem from http://www.tlw.ph/blog/my-oath-to-you/

I remembered the word "oath" being misspelled as "oat" in a letter so carefully typewritten almost 6-7months ago (even though there were typographical errors). I have everything documented (reaching upto 16 pages and counting). I learned a lot and experienced pain in the process. Oh well, the poem says a lot. I hope that this remains true after 1... 2... 3... 4... years (Oh please... please... please... please, how I long cut this period short but my free will chose Obedience in Faith).

MY CONCLUSION: This poem reminds me of someone.


MY OATH TO YOU
by Gina Idea


If her reason for not being here
Is because she’s out pursuing You


Strengthening her faith
Discovering Your will
Loving You passionately


My heart will be still
And I can sleep better in the evening.
When I think of her
I’ll think of You


When I go crazy over her
I’ll go crazy over You


And I’ll love her
Because You love me


And You love us both.


It would be selfish
To ask her from You
Right now when I need her
When I want her
Because that is not love
You said love is not self-seeking.


I’ll be patient
Because You are patient.


If she’s out
Prioritizing other things
I will not envy
Because You do not.


I will not boast
About my achievements

So I can make her like me
Because You told me not too.


I will forgive and forgive and forgive
Even though she is unpredictable
Even though I don’t understand her
Even though she makes the same mistakes
Over and over

I will not keep them.
I don’t want to be easily angered anymore


I will be kind
Because You are kind.


I will do all these
Because of LOVE


So even if she’s not yet mine
I will keep pressing on
I will never stop pursuing.


I will rejoice in You
For in You
The Truth exists
And the Truth is alive


If temptation comes again
I will not fall anymore
Because of Your grace
Because of Your Spirit
Because that is not Your will.


Whatever happens
I will love.


And though this is not the proper time
I just wanna repeat this desire:


I wanna be with her.


I wanna be with her
And I don’t want any other girl
Anymore.


Sustain my patience.


Thank You
For this joyful anticipation.


I will wait
This is my oath to You.

QUESTIONS

My Journey


June 16, 2010

QUESTIONS

“He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he can never loose.” – Jim Elliot

“Bakit pa kita nakilala?” Is this a rebellious question or just an outpouring of one’s yearning to be with a beloved who will be distant for an indefinite time? In as much as I want you to be always near me, I know I can’t allow it since the timing is not right. Shall I sit in my room and ponder on our memories which we now call our past or shall I go out and work while my mind wallows on the future of us together, serving the Lord? These should not even be my options. If I consume myself with either the past or future, what about our present being apart from each other?



I thank the Lord for knowing you. I had almost been close to one of the answers to my prayers. But if you were a blessing, why was there sorrow along with the “blessing”? The problem is not in us but around us and our individual status. How I long to have this ‘time to refrain’ be made short. I have no assurance of what will happen in our lives in the future. All I have is faith.



Soon, or maybe months after, the yearning will subside but I will not erase the memory of you in me. I will take care of you in my prayers. What the Lord started, He will finish. If I am God’s gift to you, let Him unwrap me for you in the right time. If it is me, it will be me. If it is you, I will choose you. As for now, our sorrow may last for a night but joy comes in the morning.



As John Piper said, “God is most glorified when we are most satisfied in Him.” My freewill has chosen obedience to the One who is sovereign and greater than us. I cannot mold you to be the man that I want you to be.  Rest assured that the Lord knows my in-the-long-run desires – those which lie deep in my heart. I have been praying anonymously for my future beloved. If it is you who has been receiving the answers to my prayers, so be it.



As for now, I may be declaring in a gist that I really miss you so much. This is not farewell but ‘see you soon.’

Soon

"The Lord affirmed our submission to Him in Luke 6:47-48. I will wait. I will wait for you, my love. The next days would be hard because missing you would really make me cry. So long my friend, lover and brother in Christ. Our God is greater. What He did from day one, He is faithful to finish it. I will be faithful to my commitment. Trust in the Lord. My heart will be asleep but it will remain unlocked until you return. When you go to missions, please come back alive. Remember my sacrifice of being away for God's glory."


The joy of the Lord is my strength.

Galatians 2:20 (NLT) "My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

Encouragement Written February 23, 2010

*** ******* is my former roommate and schoolmate in UP Manila when she was still in her freshman years and I am on my 6^th year in Dentistry.  She now studies in UP Diliman. She sent a text message to me dated February 22, 2010 (yesterday) at 11:23pm which really reminded me to go on and refocus my mind on higher things.  The following is her exact message:

“Ate Ianne, thank you for serving as God’s instrument for me to have a relationship with him.  My walk with Him has changed me in ways, which seemed unfathomable before.  Again, thank you. God bless”

               

I wish I could share this account online as soon as now but I’d rather delay for the sake of humility.  I remember Mary’s response to the great marvel that had unfolded before her eyes regarding Jesus.  I would like to make the same reaction as hers.  It is in Luke 2:19 (NLT): “but Mary kept all these things I her heart and thought about them often.”

Gradu-WAIT-ion

When?
My heart aches.

He Is

     He is like papa. He is always proud of me. My face is in his wallet and he’s got 4 other pictures of me. He chose to be faithful to me even without giving him my commitment. He stands to it even at the midst of other women surrounding him. He admires me and helps me boost my confidence. He loves me but his affection is not selfish because he has set me free even if I didn’t ask for it. He gives me material things and never lets me go hungry. But above all, he gave me respect, love and treated me like a princess. He left physically but my face is in his heart. He is willing to invest in me. He talked to my leader to clear up his intentions towards me. He couldn’t face my mom because I told him it is not yet time. He supports me in prayer and did it sometimes in tears. In his human love, I saw 1 Corinthians 13:4-7.
   Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

Prayer

Lord, may You expose the motives of our hearts. May You show us the right path towards You. May You open our blind eyes and callous hearts to the truth of where we might be heading if we go on by ourselves alone – that is being in the life without You. Our hurts doesn’t matter to us anymore in exchange of walking in the way back to You. We know that You love us and we are trusting Your heart even though leaving our unnecessary baggage would cause us to weep. We know that Your plans far exceed ours and so we are submitting to Your will. The revelation of Your will in our lives is priceless. We are submitting to Your love. Let us be captivated by Your faithfulness once again. Let Your love fill us once again. We love You Lord!

My First Love

                They say, “You’ll never forget your first love.”  So I want you to be my first love because you’re the only man I would like to remember for all my life on earth next to God. [But my mom is another issue so let’s leave it like that.  She is one of our counselors who really love us.]  I desire purity so I tenaciously guard my heart and keep it reserved and pure for you alone.  I know that our future may not be perfect.  We may fight and make-up.  We are imperfect and it is actually Jesus who has made us righteous by grace.  My heart belongs to you.  I have long been waiting for you.  I have been fighting for you in my prayers.  I hope that the greatest commandment is made incarnate in you.  I know it is not yet time for us to know that you are for me.  I praise the Lord for preserving me and keeping me guided.  I love you and I am patiently, though painfully, waiting for you. 

Proverbs 22:11 (NLT) Whoever loves a pure heart and gracious speech will have the king as a friend.

I'm not missing you? But I do.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9eVjrSxYh0

Recapturing My Mind Back In Line

                Refocus your mind to what is before you, Ianne.  There are a lot more out there to reach out.  Keep on planting seeds in the people around you.  In due time, the harvest will be reaped.  I know you would like your harvest to be bountiful so plant generously and boldly in reverence to the Lord.  Remember that your work is not in vain.  The reward is indispensable and highly priced to the point of reaching a state of being priceless.  Investing in people’s lives for God’s kingdom is worth your blood and sweat.  God sees.  He knows.  Live in victory. Let Him be glorified in your life.

Not be put to shame

Because the Sovereign LORD helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore, I have set my face like a stone, determined to do his will. And I know that I will not be put to shame.

Isaiah 50:7 (NLT)